Thought Process
"I ain't as crazy as I seem to be, it's just that nothin' is the way that is seem's to me. Im feelin' less then, druggin' him up with anti-depressants, In essence im threatenin my character assessment Truth told, I figure a few hoe's mixed with some new clothes should cover my loop holes. If I'm misunderstood or mis-guided, started when they passed the L' said 'just try it' "

- Joe Budden, Angel in my Life
Information
My name is Jarell & I'm a drug addict. I'd rather be alone, rather then surrounded by familiar strangers. I listen to wayy too much R&B & i hate you all.



January 31, 2009 @ 6:08 PM
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jessica alba > beyonce
" i'd do anything... anything ? anythingg for youuu"

fuck bloggin right now, watchin my nephew and tired. i slept most of all day though, didn't fall asleep til 6 something while watchin family matters online. i need to find the new episode of monk tonight or check to sen when usa will be replayin it yenno ? today, i didn't wake until like 2 PM and that was because i wanted to jump up and be nosey. this bed is comfortable though. i'm glad i bought this shit, hopfully it lasts a long time. but i guess i'll log back on later tonight, when i get bored and decide to read each and everyones blog and comment on them and stuff like that. i get bored when it's late. have nothing to do and just decide to go to sleep, so i'll blog and comment blogs round then. cause right now i'm about to watch this rick ross video and listen to this 50 cent diss. i thought it would've been boring but then again 50 is a fuckin retard, i like hearin him clown niggahs.

i bought a box of blacks today, them shits hopfully will last me a while instead of me smokin them up like 2 a day and shit. but i had help so can't blame me. sister would smoke some, id smoke it. keep in mind she's pregnant, she still smokin like a dummy too. my nephew need to just hurry and come. i'm tired of sharin blacks. i think i'll end this blog short, and come back to edit it later. iloveyouall. ok, i lied. fuck ya'll.


rick ross v.s. 50... too funny. rick ross ain't even important, what niggahs mean he on top of the game ? rick ross ain't THAT good, he's aight. but i don't know about that beef, it's gonna be funny though. 50 loves killin niggahs career and shit. i fuck with 50 only when theres beef brewin', if he's tryna sell records i leave that niggah alone. he can make a hook, but sometimes the songs are just as dumb as soulja boys.... nah not soulja boy but you get where i'm tryna go. but fuck 50 for killin ja rule's career. why all my fav rappers had issues with 50 ? budden had a problem with gunit, game! smh... ja rule wasnt my fav rapper, but i liked his music. 50 just love tryna ruin careers and shit. fuckin gorilla lookin ass niggah, only niggah from shady aftermath worth listening to is eminem, maybe dre but eminem prolly writes his shit now so eminem is the only niggah i'm fuckin with unless his next album is horrible and i doubt it is.

today, i woke up like at 2 and still was sleepy but decided to get up anyway. went to the trash, mailbox and to the store and get some blacks and a honey bunn. i didn't want it, but just got it anyway. tomorrowww, i'm gettin some KFC i hope and i got a 12 pack of sprites that i prolly done murked though. i know i had like 5 already, but i'm a stop drinkin them after this one. them lil caprisuns was too good. i know i was drinkin 5 a day. had two boxes and after 2 days they're goneee. superbowl, tomorrow ? i guess i'll be watchin that bullshit. i don't care who wins, panthers ain't in it so fuck the superbowl. carolinaaaa! we'll get it next year... i hope. if they don't, new england get it and i'll be happy.

I guess i'll just post a gif or two...


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January 30, 2009 @ 1:43 AM
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" rell's just not that into you "


new motherfuckin blog on the way! get ready niggahs, not now... maybe like 5 something in the morning when i have nothing to do... so ya'll niggahs WAIT for it. but uhh, i'm about to hit up some homework, watch some videos on WSHH... check to see if joe budden dissed saigon bitch ass again yet and listen to these songs... rihanna "hatin on the club" track was aight, i got them EXCLUSIVES! get like me foreal. i'll edit this inna minute though, so if you come back and see this unedited then i'll get to it ASAP.. maybe i forgot and went to sleep, or maybe i remembered just didnt wanna do it. PLUS IM ABOUT TO PLAY SOME 360! today was a goodday, foreal it was.. hopfully it's a good day tomorrow. HAWLUH!

aight i'm BACK, this niggah carmen done jacked my layout & shit... it's cool though, I DONT MIND! but yeah, today... woke up a couple minutes late and had to rushh out the house. got there earlier enough to study real quick and get a A on that fuckin test, shit wasnt even hard. but MATH next week.. that's gone be hell though. come from school, and everybody all dressed upp i'm tired wantin to go to sleep, motherfuckers happpy bout her taxes. dish me 150 and gave mom 200. i spent that 100 quick, that tells you i'm horrible with money. can't give me SHIT. plus i'm gettin my school money and some more money so shittt.. i'm a get all this unimportant shit like today. i wanted to get NBA live 09, but i wanna wait til i get my new gold card membershp before mine expires. i haven't been online inn minute though, been gettin my ass dragged in 2k9 though, i almost won like once and then these niggahs started foulin at the end and won by like one shot. i was pissed, buttt... i'll redeem myself.

sister went to doctor, been there for a good 5 hours... i fell asleep at gma house watchin soap operas and shit. that shit was so boring, and that couch felt good as hell. i'ma get a good sleep today. got me a new airbed until i get my matress for my bed and shit.. i might not even bother might just get them futons that i can fold out as a bed and fold into a lil chair whatever. a niggah don't want a bed crowdin up the room. i'm bout to play 360 after this blog, well go smoke a black like ALWAYS then play the game. lol @ katt williams... 'hold uppp, wait a minute. let me put some pimpinn itt it" niggah on drugs now, gettin slapped in clubs and lying about it and shit. niggah was on the radio lying his ass off, actually confusing me. going from sayin he got snuffed to sayin he got slapped to back that he got snuffed and how he ain't get knocked out. man, as long as he's still funny, and stay making movies and shit i wouldn't care.


LMAO, 50 was waiting on some beef. he was tryna trap lil wayne daring him and shit, now rick ross got the nerve to talk some shit. i don't even remember what rick said but it was some simple shit, idk where the diss came from but this niggah came out the blue with a diss to 50, and 50 like always gone be ignorant and respond. that niggah loves beef. jay z need to diss 50 or something, a decent beef worth watchin. rick ross is another fat joe just he ain't as good as fat joe even though he sells more.. i think fat joe is a better artist. but who cares 50 gone fuck 'em both up. but yeah, i'm on this twitter shit and it ain't as addictive as i thought it wouldve been. trey gay ass talkin bout this shit addictive, nobody followin his ass! nah, i wouldn't know but that shit ain't that big of a deal. it's too simple to me. should've atleast have something else to it shit. but i'm complaining so don't pay me no mind. i tend to do that shit when i'm bored. it seems to entertain ya'll motherfuckers.


this song is hard, i think i'm a write to this beat sooner or later. i need me a mic and some beats, and something to record on. i got the beats, the mic won't cost that much and i got torrents to download something to record on ( pro tools ) i'm only good with protools and fruityloops so fuck all that other shit niggahs be claiming they use and shit. i like this song though, niggahs sayin jada can't make a album... niggah album might actually be aight. i'll buy it just to support the bastard and cause i think he deserves the shit more then some of these lame niggahs that's selling, like soulja boy... etc. soulja boy ain't selling though, so fuck him. i think he lied about gettin robbed too, either that or he's scared to even talk about it.

tomorrow, i think i'm going to go ride around the city and bullshit around. hit the mailbox and check for my money. if it ain't in there i'm a come home and play 360 all day until i pass out. OHWELL! nothing to do in sumter but party & bullshit... and i don't do the club shit... that shit does nothing for me. be in the club with a bunch of drunk niggahs and bitches... either fightin or tryna find something to bag. lol @ me going to the club before my cousin went to texas for basic training. which was a WHILE ago, i get caught on the dance floor while niggahs fightin and gettin carried out the club. some broad in a dress, drunk up tryna dance with me and shit while i'm tryna walk through the crowd. niggahs done went fool, from fightin to bringin guns in the club and shootin up the club every night and these niggahs don't do shit but let the SAME niggahs back in and not check em. only place worth going to is the mall, walmart ( which is where er body be ) or a club, and the clubs is mostly packed with BLACK niggahs so you get in and you gone be sweatin like hell especially in the hood spots. but yeah.. i gotta pee and i'm tired of writtin so FUCK YALL and have a nice one.

" it ain't your beauty, it's your booty "


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January 27, 2009 @ 1:38 AM
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" don't go. . . ckuz you make livin' so difficult
when you're not here with me. "

i'm pretty tired right now, but i just wanted to blog real quick. might not be anything long... just a quick recap of my day or whatever. it might be long.. cause right now i'm edit'n my singingbox now that it's back working. ( mad firefox won't play it ) but i got two other internet services so idc, maybe my firefox is just malfunctioning and mine only. idk. but while these songs upload to fileden i guess i'll edit this shit. i signed up for twitter today, i have no idea why... but it should be decent. doesn't seem like no gay shit. it just sounds gay " twitter " maybe it's just me though, that just seems gay. but i signed up as ( drugmoney ) if you're on it and lookin for me. now that i think of all the things i wanna write about... this blog actually might come out to be as long as my last two blogs. if you don't feel like readin, i ain't askin you too. i'm just in the writin mood. i gotta get a password to microsoft office 2007 also. FOR THOSE WHO HAVE IT, hawluh at me i ain't buyin that shit.

today, was a bullshit day. i won't bother to complain, cause atleast i didn't have no hard ass homework and shit. it was a cool day at school, was actually not listening to my teacher in my first class... i was on the internet doing other shit, thought she'd noticed me but she didn't. that was cool, i'm gettin back addicted to CS.. that's gonna have to end like foreal. that shit is no good. but 2nd class was decent. she went over the quiz that i obviously did great on... and then she teached us the next chapter or whatever. it wasn't that big of a deal, i just hate sittin there doing math a whole hour and 20 minutes of my day. i don't know why, i just feel like high school was useless. i did all them math classes to GET A JOB, not to go to college and do more to get a job. i'm buggin & i'm complaining, don't mind it.

but other then classes, my day was okay. came home to my nephew & mya ( his first cousin ) walkin around my living room. two bad ass kids, that's horrible but she wasnt even bad. just cried alot... u put her down to walk she cried, you go to lay her down she'll cry.. i guess that's just lil girls. idk. played the game, got on here... went back to the game & texted a lil... i think i need a new phone ( i don't NEED, i just want... for the hell of it ) but another blackberry just cause my phone startin to get annoying. i want something new, idk what kind though. i know i gotta pay my brother some money for my phone bill when i get taxes or sometime soon cause he gone start bitchin about it soon. I GOT YOU BRO. i gotta hit up rock hill and check out wan's college. i haven't left sumter since i came back from delaware... well columbia, but that don't count. it's right down the street basically.


100 to 0 ? that's not possible, how did they NOT score at all ?



" sorry is not enough "

so i downloaded a bunch of r&b songs, i can't do rap no more... until joey drop new music or another decent rapper put out some soulful music. keri hilson got a new song with ne - yo, but i don't really like it... i don't like her, she's just kinda cute or whatever. idk why this niggah trey been sayin she BAD, SHE AIGHT! gtfon. she kind've sounded like beyonce just now though. fuck her, i took a sleepin pill and i should be sleepy now but i'm not. WHY i took it ? cause i've been up mad late latley and that can't continue during the weekdays when i got a 9AM class and shit, even though it's just like one class tomorrow and thursday SO WHAT, that's too early to be wakin a niggah up talkin bout learning some damn difficult computer shit yenno ? but i got a test, well a quick quiz that i'll study for in FIVE seconds.

about tianna, i mean i gave it though. maybe the shit she said about my personality and my character ain't such a big of a deal i made it to be. i was just buggin on some dumb shit. i mean, i felt it was cause it came outtah no where and i expected HER to know that shit, and to know that's how i am but i just assumed she didn't after that. made me feel like she didn't even know me at ALL. ( i'm ready to fall, what about you ?) i went to everybody bitchin about that one small thing though, that was kind've whack of me. and all of a sudden maddd people poppin up outtah no where. i gotta calm it down and start ignorin some motherfuckers. only way for things to go back to the way it was. i hate how things are between me and tianna, just readin her blog got me shaking my head. btw, i did fell asleep last night.. why would i hang up on you ? think about it. i went to sleep and woke up at like 6, and drunk some kool aid and stayed up til like 8 until i fell the fuck to sleep. GREAT SLEEP but then agian i was yawning the whole time in class... i was hope'n nobody notice ESPECIALLY NOT THE TEACHER





this j holiday song has been in my head for the past minutes along with that dream & mariah carey song... mariah killed that shit, fuck dream.. he DID AIGHT, but mariah with her lil high notes and her voice... killah! i listen to too much r&b. hiphop is losing a fan! i kid. i can't EVER turn my back to my motherfuckin hiphop <3!

" tell me what they know about my love "

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January 25, 2009 @ 3:30 PM
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" don't break it, it's yours "


so celtics game just win off, won by 24 i think... or 25 either or, we still got in dallas ass badly. spurs and lakers about to play and then later detroit playing. i'll be watchin all both games all day, i don't got school til this time tomorrow... so i got a whole day to waste until i have class. watched Notorious with cammie yesterday, mostly all night, she gettin all happy bout the sex scenes... it was a good movie though. funny at times, and intrestin'. should been some better actors though. the actin sucked and shit. but i won't complain about the movie cause i sat there and enjoyed it and didn't pay a damn dollar to watch it. so i won't even complaing about shit, the chick in the movie did make kim look like a lil slut though. don't mean i still wouldn't stick my dick in her a few times or what not.

sister woke me up this morning to put the car seat in jessicas car ( sister in law ).. she just brung him back and he didn't wanna let her leave, he being a lil punk crying and walkin back, form room to room.. don't know who he want. he prolly just sleepy. i'm about smoke a black though. he's gone be short if he come down here lookin for me. but uhh, today i dont' think i'm a do anything but sit here and download music and watch movies and shit. nothing else for me to do, lakers was winning by just now buttt, spurs catchin up so.. i'm a watch this game after i finish this blog and talk to cammie prolly. but she's not really respondin like she was last night. swear we talked all last night, even went to the text and was still talkin.

neesha thinks she pregnant, lmao... she just lost her virginity or so she say. i couldn't fuck a virgin, i mean it would be nice... but the bleedin and the sensitivity... nah i'm the type that i don't really like going slow and gentle unless it wanna enjoy the pussy. if i wanna enjoy it, i'll take it slow and be gentle. but if its a jump off or a one night stand type broad... i'm ramming that shit in so i can get my nut. fuck all that making love shit, only might do that with a chick i KNOW i'll be with for a while or fall for or some shit. but you ain't gotta worry about me fallin no time soon. left and right, broads been dissapointing me... i don't even want nothing real anymore, i mean if i find it then i'll take it but until then i ain't lookin for or puttin as much in it anymore. okay, fuck that subject.

i listened to zshares of joe budden on shade45 radio, the shit niggahs say on the radio. i'm mad they don't play game on eminems radio station. thought the beef was just between 50 and him, that's fucked up. but yeah... heres a lil video of some of the session on the radio... it might autoplay but i don't care... ya'll niggahs better learn how to scroll and pause that shit. and fuck you nae, dark ass tryna play me on CS earlier.. knowing damn well my number was locked in your phone. i lost your number by mistake, don't try and play me out lil niggah.



i didn't listen just now, cause i'm too lazy, but most likley he's talkin shit about saigon and how he didn't write the 2nd diss. even if saigon didn't, the shit was still horrible. i can't fuck with saigon, he's just not entertaining ( music wise ) niggah couldn't drop his album, after having 32323 hits he sitll ain't drop his shit. had hot beats for nothng. it's sunday though, i think i'll stop bloggin and look for monk online. i missed that shit friday and it seemed like a good episode from what i seen. monk > house, CSI and all that boring shit. just so ya'll know.

another thing i wanted to say, you ever met a broad and all you want is some pussy, but you don't think it's gone be that easy but you try anyway and it just happens. you bag it and think that's it but the motherfucker stick around like you WANT her around. mannn that's one reason i stopped fuckin with random broads, cause everytime i meet one that shit happens. they end up fallin for me and shit. But oh well. i think i'm a go smoke this black now, get something to eat and hopfully my nephew doesn't follow me back to my room to put him to sleep like he always do. but i might be back to blog later... until then ya'll enjoy this and take it easy


this song was stuck in my head all night and shit. i don't know why i like it so much, but it ain't annoying like them dumb ass beyonce songs that every broad be singing ever minute of the fuck day. i'm a go though.

enjoy the fuckin song, hawluh!

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January 24, 2009 @ 1:29 AM
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" click - click, bang bang... shot right through my heart "
( this might be a long post & to stop the music, scroll down and press pause
of the saigon WSHH video )

so it's been a MINUTE, but oh don't count me out yet... a niggah was just caught up and all types of bullshit nah mean ? not referring to nobody at all, just sayin.. it was a bunch of bullshit that had me caught up from gettin on here bloggin. from the girl, or ex as of yesterday... to the lazyness to just not even seeing the purpose of bloggin. but i got 3 followers, and i've been slackin major big time. i'd jump and blog real quick and that'll be it for the WEEK. well nah, i'm back... and back to what i do best which is complain and bicker about the shit that goes on around me. worldstarhiphop and joebuddentv is where i've been at mostly... if not there, i'm on CS if not THERE i'm not online period. so i've been avoidin this site from day one like hell. and the internet did some bullshit just now... a niggah tryna find music to put on my player and the shit close out. fuckin whack!

but just overall it's been a stressful week, or couple of weeks i must say, alot of this and that going on. mom don't have chemo anymore, but she's still sick it's just her hair isn't fallin out anymore cause the chemo is over. radiation or whatever is next but that's right round the corner and she might be going back to work sooner than later or say her doctor. she seems too comfortable and lazy now, i doubt she'll wanna go back but she'll have to get back used to working again.. mostly until i get a job a DECENT job and a job that can handle all the bills and she can just leave that gay ass plant she's at. but i doubt that'll happen cause she likes working around the house even when she can't do much she likes to get her ass up and wash dishes and clean and all that shit she use to do alot of but can't anymore.

my sister big ass can't do much either, she's soon to drop another one. he's suppose to be coming march, which is less than 3 months away, got another NEPHEW on the way. like last time, i'll have a shitload of pictures... maybe this time i won't have to use my camera phone but whatever, as long as i get a picture of him. oh yeah, she's naming [ zamari JERELL benjamin or anderson ] that will be one special kid, with the perfect middle name. and yeah, my name is spelled jerell on my birth certificate but OH WELL, mad i always thought it was spelt jarell and never knew til i actually read my SS# card. My lisience doesn't say jerell though... idk.

let me say, some crazy shit been poppin up on WSHH... for those who don't hop on it or don't want to i'm a post the videos here inna quick minute ( fuckin CP trippin, just cutt on me and wouldnt'cut back on... i had to take the battery out and all and still wouldn't come on. had to unplug the charger and cutt it back on without the charger in. either its gone crash or the charger is fucked up. WHATEVER IT IS, it better straighten the fuck up.


i can't lie and say the end wasnt funny, when he got on joe on the pump it up beat but that's about it.. i'm not feelin dude like that. the beef between the two was whack to me, saigon just showed he ain't gone just let joe diss him and get away with the W. but he just ain't gettin the job done. failed the criteria. he did alright with the diss though, he didn't suck completely... like his first shit. his first response to joe was kind've whack. he had a few good lines gettin at joe but it didn't really make me feel like he won that round, nor did he won this round regardless of what niggahs say, he did get at joe though make no mistake.

ANOTHER thing..


O'Reilly, and the other dude... these niggahs are wyling. i mean jay and jeezy did went all out and really got on bush, prolly wasn't needed but god damn. these niggahs hear that and throwin wordplay around, sayin slick shit or what not. i mean, to me all i see is HATE, it wasnt that big of a deal. " no more white lies, my president is black " them boys here that and get upset. they could've kept there comments and left it alone. like, c'mon.. its a celebration bitches. of COURSE it's fuck bush... appreciate his effort. be happy, and sing along.. quit complaining like niggahs CARE.. EVEN FOX had something to say. i would post that video but nah.

but besides them videos, my day was swell. went shoppin with moms and nephew... dropped sis off to hospital. my soon to be 2nd nephew won't act right for the doctors so she'll be right back up there the day i have to go to school. they call for freezin rain tomorrow, which might results to ice which i'll def. hate. we might have to leave the crib and go to the grands cause this house will get cold as soon as electricity stops working. i don't mind sleepin on the living room floor or some shit. but uhh, i really can't write something brief about my week. just know i missed two days of school, one for MLK and the other cause of snow. went wed and Thursday and had a quiz and a lab to do. got it done though, so no worries at ALL.

tomorrow, i don't know what's going to happen. i might end up somewhere in the city or i might go to st. john. that niggah BK back from chicago... niggah was in the navy and i heard he got kicked out he told me he left cause it was boring and all they did was sit behind a computer and get yelled at. sounds true, when i went to see my brother in TX that's all they did mostly. not to him but while we walked around, we seen lil groups of em running round and they'll stop... get yelled at for something then start back running. i have a temper problem, them niggahs all in my face hot breath and all id have to swing and hit one of em. just so they'll get the message i don't like that all in my face shit. sorry, i'm not with that. but yeah... like i was suppose to do a WHILE ago i'm a leave on that note. i think i started this at like 2 or 3, and it's 4:31 now and rosanne is on. i hope this goes off soon cause i need some full house to put my ass to sleep like it always does. but i'm gettin hot from this heater and i'm sleepy and i'm thirsty so HAWLUH

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January 19, 2009 @ 5:23 PM
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so i had me a black, and my mind is all fucked up. not because of the blacks but because of you motherfuckin females. ya'll mood swings are HELL... i don't know what to even say about it anymore. shits get to the point where i don't even wanna respond to the dumb, confusin shit ya'll say. but tonight is MY night, i'm watchin basketball and hope'n for some snow tonight. hopefully it just snows real hard tonight and through the morning. like a shit load of snow... 3 to 4 inches and it just piles up hopfully. i just don't wanna move tomorrow, just stay home and enjoy my break from school. i know it's bad i already want a break from school but so what motherfucker ?

i'm tired, i stayed up til like almost 6 in the AM... that's hell and woke up like 1 something this afternoon. but never the less i'm not as sleepy as i thought i would be. time to watch my game cause my nephew just came in spittin about to fuck me up from typin' so i'll be back to blog tomorrow or later tonight maybe. i ain't sure, depends on whats on my mind and how i feel. detroit and memphis about to play now... then boston and suns then cavs and lakers. i think that last game will be the best one outtah them most, even though boston's my team... they been fuckin up latley i stil have faith

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January 16, 2009 @ 2:27 AM
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" the old me is dead & gone.. dead & gone "

some of you birds are like comedians i don't even know why i bother with ya'll. it's like one minute it's all good, then next minute ya'll mad or just actin dumb or weird for some reason. tianna's been the only one that's been botherin me the most. we'll talk for a minute, then next minute she's on some other shit. either i get ignored or she just act weird... i'll leave that alone for her and herself to figure out. i feel dumb for even entertaining the bullshit though. but other then that, today went by slow. was tired but that came and left. was driving all day. drove to school and BACK then drove around town from one side to the other, drove to my uncle house, drove to the hospital. i finally let my sister drive then. school, was even crazier... the work is gonna kill me but i'll be aight. tonight, nuggets & bulls won. cavs should've won even though i don't like the fact there rank was better than celtics. Celtics play monday i think, i'll be watchin them beat suns ass on MLK day. THEN tuesday is school.

alot of people are just poppin from out the blue all of a sudden. a hand full of people i barley talked to, or no longer talk to like that. i mean, i left jay alone cause he seem like he was going through shit and i like to joke around and shit so i couldn't be serious. but i'm refering to the broads, they just poppin up... or IM'n me like crazy now. i'll be back tomorrow to blog about some more dumb shit though.

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January 9, 2009 @ 9:48 PM
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" maybe i'm better off without you "

so today was overall a long day, woke up extra early to sit up at a doctor office for HOURS and shit right ? so we got up there like at 7 or some shit, ended up being in there til like 3 almost 4, and it closes at 5. so we just gave up and left, scheduled one for tomorrow. hopefully that works so i can hurry and get checked and get it over with. my throat is still hurtin, might have to get my tonsils out but my right eye is red, and it has been like that for almost a whole 2 days going on 3. but yeah, sis went to get her food stamps, since she aint working and moms not working and IM not working. she went and got those until her 2nd baby come and she go her black ass back to work and i'm stuck with two bad ass babies. if she stil be living here then.

i gotta play some more 2k9 online tonight, i've been slacking. i'm bout to go back to school and shit so i'm gone need to start back playing it this weekend so i won't be too busy with homework and shit to even touch that shit. i know the math gone have me OD busy, and i hate that fact. my math should be easy though. i'm mostly worried about mising clases and that 209 class i got. we making computer and shit from scratch, like actually buildin them up and shit. that should be cool or what not. i'm ready for classes to begin already, they'll end as quick as they did last year.

i haven't got any texts all day, motly yahoo messages and i sometime ignore them cause they don't know how to say all they wanna say in one message, they send about 50 messages. niggahs playing games, acting stupid and then other niggahs cryin and complaining about small shit. oh well, they'll be aight. other motherfuckers back on that not talkin to me bullshit... fuck em all, i'm only responsible for ME. i'm going to smoke this black, watch me a movie or play 2k9 or something and then rest peacefully. no textin/callin me after this, cause its BROKE.

" quick to tell a niggah to never call you again
with that said, how can i call you a friend or anything more "

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January 8, 2009 @ 7:30 PM
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i hope it BURNS everytime you remember me

ayyy, so i haven't blogged inna minute. why ? idk, just don't be feeling it like that. i get on and just say fuck it. go on my hiphop sites, and be off in a hour or two. but now, all my hiphop sites havent updated yet so i'm stuck doing nothing and i gotta keep occupied to stay awake. i haven't gotten my full 8 hours of sleep, niggahs woke me up early to drive them to the hospital. grandfather gotta get his OTHER leg cutt off... smh. niggah can't take care of hiself. had his first leg cutt off a while ago, now he's gettin the other off so he's just out of luck for atleast walkin a lil anymore. that leg is gone. he was in pain in the hospital, i had to leave out of there. he kept making noises and i couldn't bare it. plus i had nephew and he kept watchin him and lookin at how black and red his toes were. that shit was definitley disgustin. it's getting cutt off i think tomorrow or the day next. one of them days, so i know we'll be back up.

school start tomorrow, got 3 classes now 2 cpt classes and math AGAIN. mom gotta go to columbia for her doctor apointment, sister got doctor apointments all over the month until march when she have her second son. mom's last apointment in columbia thankfully... might have to go back to check up or something but not to stay like 6 hours while she's in chemo. i understand why she had to be there so long but its too long. but yeahhh. in other news, i cant stop listenin to this track. this sample is hot, i wish i knew it was saying. the ace da vinci - two in a bucket track. i heard it before, just never really gave it a chance and played the whole thing. now i can't stay off aaliyahs page, weird.

i'm about to surf the web or something, tired of bloggin already. niggahs been ignoring me lately. BACK on that bullshit. i see i always seem to entertain it though. back to my idc attitude then, niggahs just gone deal with it. i'm done caring cause niggahs take it for granted and shit. sit around and try to abuse it and i'm not with it. so thank you all for this. i'm gone.

" nothing lasts forever, whatever... "

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January 5, 2009 @ 1:30 AM
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" i don't know what's REAL anymore... "

watchin honey mooners right now, i've already seen this shit a few times but nothing else is on worth watchin. i haven't blogged since last year mostly because i'm lazy and i don't bother typin the site and all that other gay shit. signin in, writin a bunch of shit. tomorrow i gotta drive to columbia, my usual. well i gotta drive FROM columbia. Moms gone try to drive to columbia, she might not be able to drive all the way to the hospital, i'll be there to drive if she can't. we gotta get up at 6, which is not long from now so i might need to go to sleep. tianna called, talked to me for like 12 seconds and then hung up. idk why, but ok.

i'll re write this shit later, i just got sidetracked and completey forgot i was writin this shit. BBL

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