Thought Process
"I ain't as crazy as I seem to be, it's just that nothin' is the way that is seem's to me. Im feelin' less then, druggin' him up with anti-depressants, In essence im threatenin my character assessment Truth told, I figure a few hoe's mixed with some new clothes should cover my loop holes. If I'm misunderstood or mis-guided, started when they passed the L' said 'just try it' "

- Joe Budden, Angel in my Life
Information
My name is Jarell & I'm a drug addict. I'd rather be alone, rather then surrounded by familiar strangers. I listen to wayy too much R&B & i hate you all.



October 28, 2008 @ 10:58 PM
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" become DONE giving a fuck & done calling. "

i'm watchin the game, celtics won by 5 like i already knew and now lakers are barley beatin portland and i'm watchin dragon ball z ckuz i don't really care for this game unless kobe starts dunkin on niggahs and shootin threes and all that good shit. until then fuck these gold jersey wearing ass niggahs. fuck everyobdy today, i just feel like everybodies my fo today.... i don't give a fuck. don't bother me, i hate being ignored... even if i'm not being ignored i hate the fact that i acutally did something outside of my boundary and i was stuck lookin dumb in the face so that's the end of me doing that shit.

i was gonna vent and blog with all that good shit in it but i changed my mind now that i've calmd down a LIL, not totally just a lil bit. still got a headache and still not giving a fuck so don't bother me. you'll be lucky to get nice response. PEACE

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@ 6:11 PM
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i never gave a fuck what a niggah thought bout me

fuck bloggin though, i need to erase my text messages and shit of that sort. messages full and shit gettin' mad that all i see is one name in that shit... ridiculous. ( chirp away you bird bitches ) but that's a whole nother subject we won't get into at the moment. i think i'm a switch the blog up ckuz i can't write long blogs or this shit might look all adnormal like and shit. i ain't COOL with that. i haven't really sat down and talked through my fingers inna minute so after i fix the blog up and do all these other crazy things to this piece of shit i'm a get to that, ASAP nah'meen. i had a mean ass headache earlier though i'm so glad that shit went away. Felt like a brick was lyterally being banged against my forehead which would be crazy.

dear summer, i know you gone miss me. it's cold as a bitch out there foreal though. i swear i had on a jacket and still felt like i was gone freeze. i love that shit though, the coldness gets me sick but i'm in love with being cold... in love w/ winter period. idk why, it's just how i am. i'd rather it be winter all year round but that'll be horrible. niggahs won't EVER get better. instead of niggahs worryin about AC, niggahs fightin over them lil heater things.. shit fightin over heat period. but i mean crack heads/bums can find heat... should be hard for us to get it with money yenno ? that's my cue though, time to do something productive. and liyah, i've known you for 4 years and i JUST reccently heard how you sound.. that's bananas! be easy though, peace.

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@ 10:36 AM
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" fuck the world, fuck my moms & my girl

didn't have class today, but still decided to sit in this room and sit on this computer and bullshit around, but in 10 minutes i'm a go outside to the car and wait for my 2nd class to start. Math's gone be boring but i need to know the work before i try to attempt to do the homework online but yeah, fuck tianna. i'll be back later, but before i leave... you ever talked to a chick and all she wanna talk about is her bf ? like, "i miss him, he do this he do that... we did this" that shit is annoying. especially when she keeps talkin and you stop respond. same for bitches

but i doubt any niggah would talk about there broad OD like that, ckuz i know i wouldn't so yeah. time to leave this class in a hour. next class starts at 11:35 but i'll be in there at 11:00 to catch up with the work

" well maybe not moms, juslet me remain calm"

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October 25, 2008 @ 3:07 PM
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" if you believe, you'd do best without me "

so yeah, i'm lisenin to this song on my blogspot, keep replaying it and about to get up and walk round the house just ckuz this shit is boring. i need a youtube account, i have so many i just want one i can stick with and remember the password too. but yeah, i was pissed moms woke me up early today ckuz i lookd fowarded into sleepin all late but niggahs woke me up. been out all morning, relaxin for now and we have noooo gas in the car. i'm mad lil young broad up the street look like she pregnant. i mean she aint young, like two years younger but still... broad look either bigger or pregnant. rockin all red and shit... time to go smoke a black and clear my mind. holler

" memories made in the coldest winter / - goodbye my friend, will i ever love again ? "

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October 24, 2008 @ 4:25 PM
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If you don't fuck with me, then I don't fuck with you.
If you ain't cool with me, then I ain't cool with you.

This game ain't change my, don't let it change you...
Why would I change ?

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@ 4:06 PM
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if you believe, you'd do best without me... i'll let it go.

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@ 10:34 AM
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" No - No... Notoriousss, we areeee we aree "

Idk why i been bumpin biggie for the past weeke, that niggah just is raw even years later i still love his shit. picture how he'd be NOW if he was alive... niggah would be beast'n on tracks. on his lil wayne shit but yeah, i didn't came to blog about notorious, but that movie look very interesting and shit but yeahhh i fell asleep watchin DBZ again, that shit is so addictive i can't stop watchin and i watch em back to back and shit. lol @ obama's commercial of mccain and shit. That's too funny, it's 11 days before election ? and they pullin stunts - how cute.

joe budden mixtape or album WHATEVER it is should be dropping soon and shit, i'm a make sure i download that right when i get a chance. swear i know that shit gone leak quick as fuck. knowing er body gone want that shit. i would've bought it... but i ain't with buying shit specially nothing i ain't sure of the dropping of. he might push it back to next year also. i'm gone though, btw i love tianna for those who wasn't aware. THATS my lil big tall slut.

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October 23, 2008 @ 1:22 AM
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http://i33.tinypic.com/2v9qez5.jpg

fuck jessica, i need to change my settings on my phone but i'm too lazy for that. i'm mad jessica dropped my phone THEN next day valesha gone snatch my phone from me and almost drop it... yes i was pissed just a lil bit though. i already dropped my phone a couple times now these niggahs feel like dropping my phone is nothing. but yeah, uhh went to english and did my essay or whatever and pickd up sister it was a cool day. just needed a black, bought one but that wasn't enough for me

" i need drug money - WHO GOT DRUG MONEY ? "

why is everyone calling me a whore ? i was just playing earlier, niggahs need to calm it down. rell ain't no whore at all, i'm a god damn man. but yeah, back to my DBZ. i gotta piss, get some water and then fuck with this bed and at 2 prolly i should be falling asleep and if not i'll watch some porn or some movies i downloaded. i didn't want to hang up with tianna earlier either, i just didn't want to make her stay up for me so i let her go to sleep. i mean, not LET her like, without my say she couldn't but you know, i didn't bug her about it ckuz idk i just felt she should do whatever she wants.

" you can have whatever you like... "

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October 20, 2008 @ 4:57 PM
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" if you believe you'd do best without me, i'll let it go "

i'm tired, eyes heavy... school was madd boring hopfully tomorrow be better man but if not oh well. i know it better go by quick. my nephew in here rockin with his milk, i already know he gone waste it on the bed. today was cool, didnt do no work like always - valesha and whatever the other chick name was basically did all the work, i did a lil help just ckuz its obvious how to restore a computer, that's easy. so i sat there barley doing work, and laughin and playin around and shit. valesha kept fuckin with me about her retarded ear ring she couldn't keep on her ear. swear she's a confused soul. i got homework to get done inna minute though so if my nephew ain't in here i'm a do it. i might wait til 8 or something to get it over with and shit.

let me go change up my singingbox then go to my dragon ball z site and relax for the rest of the day. I really need some rest, i need to learn how to go to sleep early, and tianna need to learn how to answer her fuckin phone ol' retarded ass ho " i'm a call u back, that's my moms " lie'n ass. i'll hollerrr

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October 19, 2008 @ 12:26 AM
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i'm tired, niggahs had me going today.

i wasn't going to go to walmart today, but something told me i should go and shittt.. i bump into lewan, my suppose to be locked up cousin trae, quenton ass... it's crazy. I had my mind set on running through walmart and just grabbin and going and instead i'm lookin round the corner at every ass that i see anddd poppin myself each time knowing that what tianna would be doing if she was in there with me. and uhh, this niggah trae bump into me and we talk then that niggah wan walk up and we talk... crazy. I get to the register and thats when 50 walk up. but yeah, i went to get a lil bit of stuff rode home with them two niggahs. dragged them in 08, and walked round places or whatever and went to the movies

bad bitches in the movies, turned out to be butterhead ass bitches, the good lookin ones had dudes so i wasn't really too hipped about it plus i know all i could do was look and i prolly shouldnt be doing that either but being that i have eyes and they can't help thereselves i had ot look atleast once. fuck tianna though, she thinks hangin up on people is cute. shit ain't cute.

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October 17, 2008 @ 9:02 PM
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In the night i hear them talk the coldest story ever told...
Somewhere far along this road he lost his soul - to a woman so heartless

how could you be so heartless ?

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October 15, 2008 @ 8:53 PM
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" i will stay... with you. "

i'm tired and shit from today, i swear i been out and about doing wayyy too much and i'm ready to relax it off tonight. I payed madd bills, went shoppin all that good shit since moms still in hospital on bed rest but can walk a lil bit now but still man. and tomorrow i got a lil bit to do and plus i gotta watch my nephew so that's gone be EXTRA on me being his heavy lil ass gonna annoy me to death specially in the car unless i drive around all day tomorrow and try and get him to fall asleep in the car

i took pictures today, but i don't feel like uploading them. just a bunch of pics of me, sis, nephew and videos and shit. i was just that bored man, i had to do something entertaining to keep my self busy and shit. ill upload them later or some shit but for now i'll lay here and watch DBZ ya'll be easy

" when the dark clouds arrive, i will stay by your side "

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October 13, 2008 @ 11:14 PM
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" everybody knows, but nobody really knows."

haven't blogged inna minute, i need to step it up.. foreal - but yeaah.. um, today was aight. was in columbia all morning and got an excuse for school. after this blog i'm a review for my test that i THINK is tomorrow. regardless i'm a study for it right now and prolly when i get the hospital for my moms second surgery, that's crazy right ? 2 big surgerys in one month... first the cancer thing and now this thing. idk what it is but i know its about her bleedin too much during her period and thats ALL i needed to know... my stomach hurts thinkin about it. i got cold in my throat and my nose is running and i'm not even tired when i should be.

me and tianna barley talk like we used to, but we still talk a good bit so i guess that's all that matters right ? right. i actually spent a few hours cleaning my room which looked horrible until now. i watched almost all 153 episodes of dragon ball in like 3 or 2 days, i think 3.. i don't know. today don't count because i wasn't home to watch it or whatever. i'm bout to watch that inna minute.

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October 9, 2008 @ 2:06 PM
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" she bust the windows out my car...
i know it's prolly ckuz i broke her heart"

this college shit is giving me headaches, i can't stand it.
i'm ready to get it over with, as soon as possible.

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October 8, 2008 @ 12:53 PM
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" hottest chick in the game, wearin my name... "

so yeah, found out one of close cousins got locked up and charged with some bullshit. Niggah been up in the house with automatic guns, drugs..etc and shit, that's crazy. just a year or two ago this niggah was the same niggah that was over my house chillin, lookin for bitches to bag out here now this niggah bout to do timeee over some bullshit his mom prolly got him in. Him, his mom & his brother going to jail... wyling!

but uhh, today was boring like usual.. but it went by quick. got work done ckuz it was a group thing and i acted like i helped, second class all she did was talk about the gender expierement thing we're suppose to be doing. i'm a do some simple shit. i'm mad all these chicks are tall now that's wild. YALL BROADS NEED TO SHRINK. but uhh, i'm mad tired.. i think i'm a watch these dragon ball z episodes and download some more and catch a nap... ya'll take it easy.

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October 6, 2008 @ 11:40 PM
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niggah i think BIG, like christopher wallace.
fuck you tianna yvonne driver, for hangin up then acting like
you're asleep, i know no one can fall asleep that quick.. so fuck u

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October 5, 2008 @ 12:13 AM
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" only way that this'll work, is if you love me when it hurts "

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October 4, 2008 @ 11:18 PM
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" you niggahs couldn't fuck the broads i choose. "

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@ 12:04 PM
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" everybody around me is a fuck up.. "

i'm tired and shit, i think sooner or later i'm a cop another nap... but i think i'm a hit up the movies today and go see Miracle at St. Anna or Eagle Eye, i ain't sure yet... i gotta see which movie got the best review to decide or whatever. For now, i'm a chill and relax. Tianna always beefin with her moms about something, they need to sit down and just talk like two grown women god damn... but i'm a be out, i barley got sleep last night.. NIGGAHS KEEP WAKING ME UP. i woke up for that money though, fuck everything else.

peace

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October 2, 2008 @ 10:05 PM
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him loves tee.
end of story.

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October 1, 2008 @ 9:34 PM
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" hey chick, what these doctors know anyway ? "

so i had to drive home from columbia today and shit, it was a cool drive until i got closer to home i got a lil nervous cuz they were doing road work and shit of that sort so they had the lil pens all in the road and ihad to carfully ride by. Moms home, that's all i care about right now, she's home i gotta make sure nobody mess with her side of the arm or none of that.. but i'm bout to hit this balck

" let me see these xrays...i ain't no expert, i'm just hurt."

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